Post by James Phoenix on Oct 31, 2008 16:34:52 GMT -5
THE BRAND WARS
A Wrestling Fanfiction
A Wrestling Fanfiction
Hello Wrestling fans!
I would like to start this out by saying that while all of the superstars and other people you will read about in this story are real, none of the events or storylines in it have ever occured in real life, nor do they relate in any way to the actual storylines of current pro-wrestling. I would also like to state that this story is currently a test. If popularity demands, I will continue it. This is a work of fiction based on the Kayfabe universe that is Sports Entertainment!
Thank You, and Enjoy!
-GPR
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JR – Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Monday Night Raw! I’m Good Old JR alongside Jerry “The King” Lawler and King this may be the most historic Raw ever.
King – You can say that again JR. Mr. McMahon has promised to make several major announcements tonight that will change sports entertainment as we know it. Any ideas on what he has to say?
JR – I don’t know King, but I don’t think we’re going to have to wait long to find out!
{NO CHANCE}
[Mr. McMahon walks out and down the ramp with a huge grin on his face while doing his McMahon strut. He climbs into the ring and is handed a microphone as the crowd quiets down]
Vince – Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Monday Night Raw! Now, as most of you have probably heard, I promised that I would come out here tonight and shake the foundation of professional wrestling and that Sports Entertainment would never be the same, and I am here to do just that. You see, over the weekend I had a business meeting with someone very important and we signed a set of contracts that have changed the face of professional wrestling as you know it. Each of these contracts there are two names. The first is yours truly, Vincent Kennedy McMahon, and the second is someone who many of probably thought you’d never see in talks with me. The WWE is the king of Sports Entertainment and no one can stand up to it no matter what they try. I’ve conquered WCW and made ECW my own. Now, I’ve done it again, because the second name on those contracts……. is Dixie Carter!!
JR – My God King, does this mean what I think it means?
Vince – That’s right, World Wrestling Entertainment has officially bought out Total Non-Stop Action!!
King – Oh my God, JR this is incredible!
Vince – TNA fans need not worry however, as all of your favorite TNA talent, or at least those worth keeping, can be seen here in WWE from now on. Now, you may be wondering how WWE is going to handle this massive influx of new talent, and not just the TNA roster but also a number of former WWE superstars that have chosen to return now that this new era of WWE has arrived. Well, I thought about that myself and I decided that the best way to hand this problem was to add a fourth brand to the WWE Universe! That brand will take the place of the now defunct TNA Impact Thursday Nights on Spike TV. That brand will be known as…WWE Heat!!!
JR – I almost can’t believe what I’m hearing! This is unprecedented!
Vince – In addition, I have decided that out of fairness to TNA, I won’t use any other defunct wrestling organization’s names in my company either. Therefore, ECW will now be known as WWE Velocity!! Also, I have decided to give both Velocity and Heat a full set of Championships for them to contest, in order to allow them to properly compete with Raw and Smackdown. Finally, I have taken one more step to shake things up again. I have decided to re appoint the rosters of all four shows. Many of the superstars you know will remain on their respective brands, but quite a few have news homes starting this week. This includes the champions of all the brands. I have appointed new champions for every title on every brand including the newly created titles. I have also made some changed to the General Management including appointing a new one for the new fourth brand. Some of you may be asking who will be on which show now. Well, you’ll have to watch all four brands this week in order to find out. I have made sure that the new rosters aren’t posted on WWE.com yet and haven’t been made public, so don’t bother looking. However, by the end of this week you will have a good idea where each brand is headed. Now, I have some more work to do, so I’ll give you your first match up, but following that, you will meet the Raw GM and he or she will introduce you to some of the members of your new Raw roster, as will occur with each GM on their respective brand this week.! Thank You!
JR – King can you believe what we’ve just been told? The WWE has been transformed and no one but the boss knows exactly how.
King – I know I sure don’t, but I’m excited to find out who we’ve got on Raw now!
JR – Well, its time for our first match so I think we’re about to see at least some of them.
[As the commentators spoke, Mr. McMahon made his way up the ramp and backstage leaving the fans waiting for their first match of the new WWE era.]
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{What’s up?! (What’s up?) What’s up!? (What’s up!)}
[R-Truth appears at the top of a stairway in the crowd and begins rapping his theme music as the fans shout along with him. He walks down the stairs singing and high fiving the members of the crowd until he finally climbs over the fan barricade and into the ring.]
JR – Well King, it looks like Raw has gotten R-Truth.
King – I’ve been watching this guy on Smackdown JR and he’s got some real talent. I’m glad to see him on the top brand now.
{La Vittoriaaaaaaa ‘e Miaaaaaaaaa}
Santino – Well, well. Allow me to-a welcome you to-a Monday nights. You must be incredibly lucky because not only to you get to be here, but you get to step in the ring with-a Santino Marella. I mean-a, you are not even in the same-a league as me. I am a top superstar of the highest-a class, whereas you are, how you say, a hoodlum. While I was training in Italy to be a world champion, you were on the streets spraying the graffiti and singing the rap-a music until you ended up in-a prison. Face it Mr. Ara-Truth, you don’t belong here in WWE, so why not just step aside so the real-a stars can-a shine!
[Throughout this dialogue, R-Truth has visibly become more and more annoyed with Santino. Finally, at the end of his little speech Truth halls off with a big right hand knocking Santino to the mat. Beth rolls to the outside as the bell rings.
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Match #1: R-Truth vs. Santino Marella:
Truth has control of the match from the start and hits some big rights and then a high kick to the face. He goes for a fist drop but Santino moves and he hits the mat. Santino then kicks Truth in the gut and begins throwing rights of his own. Santino continues his assault for a minute until Truth uses a mule kick to send Santino across the ring. He then goes off the ropes and hits the flying corkscrew lariat. He sets Santino up for the scissor kick but Beth reaches in and pulls him out of harms way. Truth crashes to the mat as the scissor kick meets air, and Santino quickly rolls him up, using the ropes as leverage to steal the win.
Winner – Santino Marella
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JR – and Santino steals one!
King – Well you have to give Santino credit; he does whatever it takes to win. And having the Glamazon in his corner doesn’t hurt either.
JR – That’s true King, but that doesn’t mean I approve of his methods. We still have to give credit to R-Truth credit for putting for on a great performance in his first match here on Raw.
Backstage:
[Todd Grisham is standing outside a door labeled “RAW General Manager”. He knocks on the door and Mr. McMahon steps out.]
Todd – Mr. McMahon, can we get a word with the general manager?
Vince – Don’t worry, everyone will get a word with the general manager in the ring.
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Commercial Break
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[When we return, everyone awaits the entrance of the Raw GM. The Raw music hits and Mike Adamle steps out onto the stage.]
Adamle – Well everyone, it seems that I was one of the people lucky enough to keep my job here on Monday Night Raw. I have to thank Mr. McMahon for allowing me to continue doing the best job I can here on WWE’s flagship. Now, as Mr. McMahon said earlier, all of the brands titles were vacated and then re-awarded based on the merit of the superstars. As a result, I would like to introduce you all to Raw’s new World Heavyweight Champion!
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{I Hear Voices in My Head}
[Randy Orton steps out as Adamle leaves. Orton poses with the title before walking down the ramp and climbing into the ring.]
JR – Well, it looks like Randy Orton is our new World Champion King.
King – And we couldn’t ask for a better one JR.
Orton – Ladies and Gentlemen, I am pleased to inform you that you now have a World Heavyweight Champion you can be proud of. As you know, I am the Legend Killer and I have taken out every superstar this company has to offer. Whether it is Triple H, The Undertaker, John Cena, JBL, or anyone else, you name him, I beat him. So you should get used to seeing this belt around my waist because it’s going to be here for a long time, and there isn’t a d**n thing anyone can do about it.
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Lesnar – Randy, Randy, Randy; Now, forgive me if I’m wrong, because my memory’s a little hazy, but I’m pretty sure you never beat Me!! So if you’re done running your mouth, why don’t we see if you can back it up in the ring.
Randy – What makes you think you’re even worthy of facing me? The last time I saw you was at WrestleMania 20 in the worst match I’ve ever seen. I mean hell; the best part of the whole dame thing was when the Austin finally put you out of your misery with a Stunner. These people aren’t behind you anymore Brock. You need to realize that you disappeared from WWE and you became irrelevant. I’m at the top of this business now and I say that you don’t deserve a title shot.
[Adamle steps back out onto the stage near Lesnar as he interrupts Orton.]
Adamle – Well, Randy, I do. I think Brock Lesnar could make a great World Champion. But, I’m not about to start handing out title shots for free. Brock, if you’d like a title shot then you have to earn one, and I’m going to give you the opportunity to do just that right here tonight. Here’s what we’re going to do. I want each of you to find yourselves a tag team partner for tonight, because tonight’s main event will be Brock Lesnar and a partner of his choosing against Randy Orton and a partner of his choosing. If you and your partner win the match Brock, then you will face Randy Orton for the World Heavyweight Title at Backlash and if Randy’s team wins, then I will find him another opponent for Backlash. Now, I suggest you two go check out the new locker room and find yourselves some partners.
JR – What a main event King! The Champion and a partner of his choosing against Brock Lesnar and partner of his choosing.
King – I can’t believe that Brock Lesnar is back in WWE, let alone that he’s in contention for the title. This new WWE era has been crazy so far.
JR – I agree King, and I think it’s only going to get crazier.
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Commercial Break
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[Beth Phoenix makes her way to the ring when we return]
JR – Well, it looks like we’re about to hear from the Glamazon, Beth Phoenix.
King – Well, we already saw her earlier during Santino’s match and I guess we’re going to hear from her now too.
Beth – I am going to make this very clear. I am the most dominant Diva on the RAW roster and therefore I deserve to be Women’s Champion. So, I want whoever the new Women’s Champion is to come out here right now so I can beat you down and take the title that’s rightfully mine!
{NO CHANCE}
[Mr. McMahon steps out to the stage, much to Beth’s surprise]
Vince – I knew there was something I forgot to mention, so thank you for reminding me Ms. Phoenix. When I said that each brand was going to be given a full set of Championships, I didn’t include Women’s Titles simply because there isn’t enough competition on each brand to warrant it. Therefore, there will be two Women’s titles in the WWE from now on. The WWE Women’s Championship will float between Raw and Velocity and the Diva’s from both of those shows are eligible to compete for it. The current champion will appear on both shows and can defend the title on either brand if a GM decided to make that match. The new Women’s World Championship will float between Heat and SmackDown and has the same rules for those two brands. Therefore Ms. Phoenix, allow me to introduce the new WWE Women’s Champion.
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{HaHaHaHaOhhhhhhhhh}
[Trish Stratus steps out to the stage to massive cheers]
King – It’s Trish!!!!!!
Trish – So, Beth, you want a shot at this title? You got it. However, Mr. Adamle has asked that the match be at Backlash. But just so you know, I’m not as fail as some of these other ladies around here, so don’t expect to win. I don’t want you to feel left out tonight though, so I asked a friend of mine to have a warm up match with you.
{The sound of a tambourine can be heard as Mickie James joins Trish on the stage.}
JR – Well, it looks like Mickie James has stayed on Raw as well!
King – Trish and Mickie! I must be dreaming JR!
[Mickie made her way to the ring and joined Beth. A referee stepped in and the match began]
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Match #2: Beth Phoenix vs. Mickie James:
The Diva’s lock up and Beth applies a headlock. She then throws Mickie to the mat and dominates most of the match. Near the end, Mickie starts coming back with a Hurricarana and some right hands. She goes for a Mick Kick but Beth ducks under it. She grabs Mickie as she spins around, lifts her into the Widow’s Peak, slams her face first into the mat, and picks up the win.
Winner: Beth Phoenix
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[Trish is still on the ramp and she stares down Beth following the match.]
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Commercial Break
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[When we return, CM Punk comes to the ring holding the Intercontinental Championship to massive fan applause]
JR – CM Punk is the Intercontinental Champion King, and I for one am glad to see that he is.
King – Well, as much as I hate to agree with you JR, Punk makes a heck of a champion and it’s good to know he’s still on Raw.
Punk – Well, it looks like I’m still here. And, as you may have noticed, I’m also your new Intercontinental Champion! As your Intercontinental champion, I will put on the best show possible each and every week and I won’t back down from any challenges. I also wanted to come out here and let you know that I’m going to do whatever I can to keep this title and no one is going to take it from me, because I’m straight edge and give me an advantage that no one else in the WWE has! Now, as for a potential contender…..
{Punk is cut off by deep Russian music as Vladimir Kozlov steps out to the stage and makes his way down the ramp}
King – Oh my gosh JR, it’s that crazed Russian from SmackDown, Vladimir Kozlov!
JR – It sure is King, and I don’t like that look in his eyes. If I were Punk I’d get out of there while he still can.
King – Well, you heard what Punk said, he’s not backing down from any challenges, and from the looks of it that includes Vladimir Kozlov.
[Kozlov steps into the ring and glared at Punk, but he stands his ground. Kozlov gets a microphone and begins speaking in Russian. After a minute, he switches to broken English.]
Kozlov – Smackdown no Competition! I come to Raw for Better Competition!!
Punk – You want better competition Kozlov? Well, you came to the right place!
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Match #3: CM Punk vs. Vladimir Kozlov
Punk attacks Kozlov with rights and lefts but Kozlov just pushes him off and across the ring. Punk runs back at him but Kozlov kicks Punk in the head knocking him inside out. He the picks Punk up and whips him off the ropes. As he comes back, Kozlov nails him in the chest with the big head butt leaving him on the mat, then pins him easily.
Winner: Vladimir Kozlov
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JR – My god King, this monster Kozlov just manhandled the Intercontinental Champion!
King – Yea and I think we’ll be seeing a lot more manhandling now that Kozlov is on Raw.
Backstage:
[Randy Orton is walking down the hallway and stops at a locker room door. He knocks on it and the door opens but we can’t see who is inside.]
Orton – Hey, I just wanted to stop by and thanks for stepping up and being my partner for tonight tag match. And don’t worry; I’ll keep my end of the bargain. One we win this match, I’ll make sure you get the title shot at Backlash so that Raw’s main event can be a respectable one.
[Orton then enters the locker room and closes the door behind him.]
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Commercial Break
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JR – Welcome back folks, it’s time for out Main Event!
{I Hear Voices in My Head}
[Randy Orton steps out to the stage and is booed by the fans. He poses and then walks a little ways down the ramp where he turns around and waits.]
{A loud siren is heard as a flashing light appears on screen.}
JR – King, is that who I think it is?
[Scott Steiner steps out to the stage and flexes and kisses his bicep as Orton smiles.]
King – It sure is JR, its Big Poppa Pump, Scott Steiner!
JR – Well King, it looks like Raw got a TNA superstar out of the merger. I was beginning to wonder about that.
King – Well, the only thing to wonder now is did Brock Lesnar manages to find a partner, and if he did, who is it?
{The pounding baseline hits as Lesnar takes the stage. The fans cheer as he poses for them. He then steps aside and turns toward the entrance}
King – Who’s it gunna be JR?
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{Rrrrrrrrrakaka You Can’t See Me, My Time is Now!!!}
[The fans blow the roof off the arena as John Cena steps out to the stage. Lesnar has a huge smile on his face and down in the ring, Orton stares in disbelief.]
JR – By God, it’s John Cena!!!!
King – Cena is still on Raw!
[Cena and Lesnar make their way to the ring as Orton and Steiner step out the other side. They pose on the turnbuckles as Orton and Steiner climb back in the ring. Cena and Orton step out as Lesnar and Steiner start the match]
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Match #4: Brock Lesnar & John Cena vs. Randy Orton & Scott Steiner:
They exchange blows and then lock up. The match goes back and forth with each man gaining the upper hand at one point or another. Steiner goes for the Steiner Recliner on Lesnar but he flips him over his shoulder to the mat. Lesnar gains some momentum but Steiner hits a huge clothesline and tags in Orton. He and Steiner proceed to isolate Lesnar in their corner and make frequent tags to keep each other fresh. Lesnar and Steiner are in the ring again as Lesnar finally manages to hit a spinebuster on Steiner to slow him down. They both crawl to their corners and both Cena and Orton get the tag. Cena nails Orton with some clotheslines and then picks him up and plants him in the center of the ring before connecting with a 5-Knuckle Shuffle. Steiner rushes in but Cena dumps him over the ropes and to the floor. He turns around as Orton tries an RKO but pushes him off and he bounces off the ropes. Cena lifts him over his head but stops as he sees Lesnar wants the tag. He tags Lesnar with Orton on his shoulders and then lifts Orton and puts him on Lesnar’s shoulders. Lesnar nails a huge F-5 and picks up the win.
Winners: Lesnar and Cena
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JR – He did it! Lesnar has earned himself a title shot at Backlash!!
King – This is going to be a great title match JR! But I don’t think Orton is going to take this loss lying down.
JR – Well, he’s certainly lying down now, but at Backlash it will be Randy Orton and Brock Lesnar for the World Heavyweight Title
Backstage:
[Mr. McMahon is seen walking through the parking lot toward his limo. He steps in and is about to close the door when a loud crash can be heard coming from somewhere else in the area.]
Vince – What the hell was that?
[Vince gets back out of the limo and walks up ahead and around the corner to investigate.]
Vince – What’s going on over here? Hey, What the hell do you think you’re doing here? Wait, what are you doing with that? Aaaaaa!
[More crashing sounds can be heard as well as the sound of steel meeting bone. The limo driver runs around the corner to find Mr. McMahon lying on the concrete floor unconscious with a nasty head wound. Blood has begun to pool near his head from the wound.]
Driver – Oh My God! Mister McMahon!! Help! We need some help over here!!!
[The driver runs back toward the arena screaming for help as the camera closes in on Mr. McMahon who still isn’t moving.]
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Grisham – Ladies and Gentleman I’m Todd Grisham alongside Matt Striker and this is the new WWE Velocity!!!
Striker – That’s right Todd, ECW is officially gone and Velocity is officially here. The question is, what has Velocity been given? We have no clue what superstars are on our roster or who our champions are. Heck we don’t even know who the general manager is!
Grisham – That’s true, but I think one thing we do know is that we won’t be seeing Mr. McMahon here tonight.
Striker – That’s right and it’s because of that vicious assault that someone laid on the boss at the end of Raw last night! However, I’ve been told that Shane McMahon will be here tonight to address what happened to his father.
{Weeelllll….It’s a Big Shoooow}
Grisham – and it looks like we’re about to be joined by the largest athlete in the world today!
Striker – You got that right. So I guess Big Show is now on the roster of Velocity.
Show – Well well, it looks like Vince has done it again. He has revamped the entire WWE just as I was getting to where I wanted to be. Now, in case you didn’t know, I’m the biggest athlete in the world which means I can pretty much take whatever I want. With that in mind, I know Mr. McMahon isn’t here and Shane isn’t scheduled until later on tonight, I am asking…no…I am demanding that whoever the General Manager of this brand is come out here and give me a shot at the new Heavyweight Title here on Velocity!
Grisham – Well, Big Show’s not asking for much is he?
Striker – He may seem out of line to you Todd, but I’m sure not going to be the one to tell him no.
{Excuse Me!!}
Vickie – Don’t worry Show, you’ll get your title shot. We may not be on Smackdown anymore, but can I assume that out agreement stands?
Show – Of course Vickie and the fact that this is a completely new brand will make it even easier to make it what you want.
Vickie – Now then, I think it’s time to make Velocity’s main event for Backlash, because there is no one back there better qualified to challenge for the title then the Big Show!
{Break the Walls Down!!}
[The countdown hits and Chris Jericho walks out to the stage and down to the ring, where Vickie joined Big Show during the previous conversation.]
Jericho – No one better qualified? How about the man who beat Stone Cole Steve Austin and The Rock in the same night to become the first ever Undisputed Champion? How about the man that destroyed Shawn Michaels and nearly ended his career? The man who survived an unsanctioned match with Shawn Michaels and won the World Heavyweight Title the same night! If anyone around here deserves a title shot, it’s me!
Vickie – Excuse me Chris, but I’m the General Manager around here now and I decide who deserves a title shot. Now, if you like you can fight the Big Show for it but I doubt you want that.
Jericho – Vickie, Vickie; I didn’t mean to seem so harsh. You know as well as I do that an impressive superstar like me deserves to be in the title picture not only for me, but for Velocity. These people need a champion that has accomplished things in this business and you need one that will bring in ratings. That champion is Chris Jericho!
Vickie – Hmm, I have to say I see your point Chris. I’ll tell you what; if you help me and Show make Velocity what I want it to be, then I’ll make sure you get the first title shot against him after he wins the title at Backlash.
Jericho – The sounds great Vickie. Plus, with the largest athlete in the world and the greatest champion this business has ever known, no one will be able to stand up to us, or you.
{I Walk Alone}
[The fans explode as Batista walks out to the stage, microphone in hand]
Batista – You have got to be kidding me. The entire company gets restructured and I get stuck with Goldilocks and her two bears. Tell you what; I’m going to make this real simple. I want the title shot and I don’t care what I have to do to get it! If I have to go through Y2Jaded and the Jolly Green Giant down there, then so be it, because nothing will stop me from becoming champion.
Big Show – Wait a d**n minute! Who the hell do you think you are coming out here demanding a title shot? I am standing in this ring with he General Manager of this brand and no one gets a title shot unless they show her some respect, and let me assure you that if you don’t, I’ll be more then happy to come up there and beat some out of you!
Vickie – Thank You Show, because you’re absolutely right. Now, Batista, why don’t you just run along and let the big boys here worry about the title.
Batista – So it’s going to be like that huh? Well Show, if you want a piece of me so bad you’re more then welcome to come up here and get it! Then, once I’m done with you, I’ll take care of that little HBK wanna-be down there, and then I’ll take out the champion to boot!!
Jericho – Look you muscle bound moron, the only one taking down the champion is me!
Show – You mean me! Hell, who is the d**n champion anyway?!
{Ohhhhhh, Yeaaaaaaaaahhhh}
[The fans get even louder, if possible, as Matt Hardy steps out to the stage with a new title around his waist.]
Hardy – Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you, the new Extreme Heavyweight Championship! And I am your champion, Matt Hardy!!! Now it seems to me that everyone wants a shot at this so I just wanted to come out here and say that I don’t really care who I face, because this title isn’t going anywhere!
Show – That’s what you think, but at Backlash, that title is mine!
Hardy – Well, I’ll tell you what Show, why don’t we step in the ring and find out just how well you do against V1!
Batista – Hey now, don’t leave me out of this little party. Besides, Show already said he wanted a piece of me tonight.
Jericho – Why don’t you cork it and hand that title over now Hardy, because we all know that no matter which of us you face, you won’t be walking out of Backlash with the title.
Hardy – I’ve got a better idea. How about tonight I team up with this raging Animal named Batista and we take on the two of you in a tag match!
Vickie – EXCUSE ME! I am the General Manager here and I make the matches, not you! But, since Show seems so anxious to get his hands on the two of you, and because I want to make sure that you don’t make the mistake of interrupting me again, I am sanctioning that match as tonight’s main event. When it’s over, I’ll announce the number one contender for the Extreme Heavyweight Championship!
Grisham – Wow, can you believe that main event Matt? A tag team match featuring the champ Matt Hardy and three newcomers to the brand! This new Velocity is already proving to be an amazing show.
Striker – You can say that again, and I for one can’t wait to see more
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Commercial Break
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{Oooooooo, Chavo}
[Chavo Guerrero makes his way down the ramp accompanied by Bam Neely. Chavo is wearing another new title.]
Grisham – Well, I guess Chavo is another one of our new champions.
Striker –I’d say so and it looks like he’s joining us at ringside, so welcome Chavo.
Chavo – Thanks Matt, and let me introduce you boys to the Extreme Television Championship. This really is a great new start because not only am I a champion but my aunt Vickie gets a brand new start as General Manager.
Grisham – That’s very true, and I see you still have your bodyguard Bam Neely by your side as well. But I have to ask what made you decide to come out here.
Chavo – Well, word in the back is that the men in this next match are the top contenders for my Television Title, so I had to come down and scope out the new competition.
Striker – Well, let’s find out who that competition is.
[Shelton Benjamin appears on the titantron screen.]
Shelton – The new Velocity. It’s about time we got a new brand that I can make my mark on and use to showcase my amazing skills. Now that I’m here, everyone will know that I am the top competitor on this show and in this entire company, and that I am truly the WWE’s Gold Standard.
{Ain’t No Stoppin’ Me Now!}
[Shelton walks down to the ring to a moderate crowd reaction]
Chavo – Alright, I have to admit that Shelton is a great competitor. He’s not quite in my league, but I respect what he’s accomplished so far and he could be a contender for this title soon.
{Some very Irish music hits and the crowd goes wild as Finlay and Hornswoggle head down the ramp. Finlay is carrying his shillelagh as usual, and Hornswoggle hands out inflatable toys and plastic hats to come of the kids in the crowd.}
Chavo – You gotta be kidding me! No man that spends his free time dancing around with a leprechaun is a contender for my title! I mean, the only way Finlay can win a match is by hitting people with that weapon he carries. This is insulting and I hope Shelton puts him in his place.
Grisham – We’ll, we’re about to see if he can do just that.
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Match #1: Shelton Benjamin vs. Finlay:
They two men lock up and engage in some straight up mat wrestling. They go through headlocks, armbars, chin locks, and a number of reversals. They finally get up and Shelton is whipped off the ropes. He turns it into a lariat and takes Finlay down. He then goes for a kick but Finlay catches his foot. He pushes Shelton’s foot away but he brings it around and nails Finlay on the side of the head. Shelton then throws some rights and lefts at Finlay but he rolls from the ring. Shelton goes for a baseball slide but Finlay pulls the apron out and traps him before unleashing a flurry of rights and lefts. He pulls Shelton free and throws him back in the ring to score a near fall. Finlay throws him to the corner but Shelton moves and Finlay crashes and gets rolled up for a near fall. Shelton continues the physical assault with punches and kicks until he goes off the ropes after which Finlay manages to back drop him over the ropes and to the floor. Both men are down as Hornswoggle climbs to the apron in an attempt to check on Finlay and will him back into the match. Bam Neely leaves Chavo and goes toward the little guy. The referee is checking on Shelton as Finlay grabs his shillelagh, reaches over the rope, and nails Bam just in time to save his son, then drops the weapon outside the ring. However, as this was happening, Shelton climbed back in the ring. Finlay turns around and Shelton hits Paydirt to pick up the win.
Winner – Shelton Benjamin
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[Chavo gets up from the announce table and enters the ring and Bam follows. Chavo nails Finlay with the title to the back of his head and then assaults him. Bam then picks him up and slams him to the mat hard.]
Grisham – C’mon now, that was uncalled for! The man already lost the match!
[Hornswoggle walks into the ring to check on his father as Chavo and Bam make their way up the ramp, with Chavo posing with his title.]
Backstage:
[Jericho and Big Show are in the locker room]
Show – Alright look, we both need this win tonight to prove that we are the dominant superstars on this brand. So just stay out of my way, and I’ll take care of our so called opponents.
Jericho – Stay out of your way? I’m the one that’s a former undisputed champion! When was the last time you even held a title? Oh, right, you lost the ECW Title to Bobby Lashley almost two years ago and you couldn’t even beat that oversized gorilla Mark Henry win it back at Night of Champions! So maybe you should let a man that has worn gold recently show you how it’s done!
Show – I may not have worn gold recently, but that doesn’t change the face that I’m a 7 foot, 500 pound giant that can snap you like a twig! So I’d suggest you back off before that happens.
Jericho – Fine, I’ll see you in the ring.
[Jericho gives Show a dirty look as he says this last line, and then walks out]
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Commercial Break
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{A set of Cuban trumpets can be heard playing when we return, and Armando Estrada makes his way to the ring}
Striker – Well, it seems our former General Manager is still here too.
Grisham – Well, after working so hard to get a contract here after making Colin Delaney do the same thing, it almost would have been poetic justice if he had been moved.
Estrada – Ladies and Gentlemen, haha, I am Armandoooo Alejandrooooo, Esssturrrrrrrrada! I am still here on the brand that I used to run, as one of the top superstars around. I just hope that with Mr. McMahon’s restructuring, he has brought over some superstars that have the guts to step in the ring with me!
{Stand Back! There’s a Hurricane Coming Through!}
[The Hurricane comes to the stage to massive cheers. He poses and then walks down the ramp and into the ring.]
Hurricane – Citizen Estrada! I stand before you as a man who has the guts to step in the ring with you, as you so delicately put it. But be forewarned that you will be no match for me and my Hurri-Powers!
///////////////////////////////////////////////
Match #2: Armando Estrada vs. The Hurricane:
The two are pretty evenly matches as Estrada takes control and uses some holds to keep Hurricane grounded. Hurricane comes back with some elbows and then some clotheslines and lariats off the ropes. He then hits a hanging DDT and goes to the top rope. He poses on top and then jumps off going for a cross body as Armando gets up. Hurricane is caught by Armando who then goes for his finisher (a lifting falling reverse DDT) but he breaks free. Hurricane then spins Armando around, hits the Eye of the Hurricane, and picks up the win.
Winner – The Hurricane
/////////////////////////////////////////////////
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Commercial Break
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The Dirt Sheet
[Miz and Morrison are in the ring sitting on tall chairs on a carpeted floor. They are also in possession of a new set of tag team titles]
Morrison – Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to WWE.com’s most popular show, the Dirt Sheet! I am the Shaman of Sexy and one half of the Extreme Tag Team Champions, John Morrison!
Miz – And of course, I am the other half of the Extreme Tag Team Champions, and your chick magnet, The Miz!
Morrison – Now, with the new Velocity in place, that means new guests for our show. The problem there is that no one really knows who’s on the roster aside from the superstars we’ve already seen tonight.
Miz – Ah, but that’s not a problem for guys like us, because we have connections. We stopped by and spoke to General Manager Vickie Guerrero and she told us about two particular superstars that she knew were here on Velocity.
Morrison – That’s right, and we managed to track them down backstage, so there they are from their locker room, Rey Mysterio and Evan Bourne.
{Booyaka Booyaka 619!!}
[Rey and Evan walk to the ring smiling despite being on the receiving end of the joke]
Mysterio – Well guys, I guess you got us….good job. But the question is, can you back it up in the ring, esse’?
Bourne – Don’t worry Rey, I’ve dealt with these guys before, they’re all talk and no walk.
Morrison – No walk! In case you forgot, I beat you one on one.
Rey – Well, you haven’t beaten me, so how about next week you and I step in this ring and we see who’s got the real huevo’s around here.
Bourne – Hey, let me in on this action, I wouldn’t mind another piece of him.
Miz – There’s a fourth guy in this ring you know, and he happens to be the other half of the tag champions!
Bourne – Yea, and I beat you already, remember?
Miz – You want a piece?
[Finally, Morrison nails Mysterio with the microphone and an assault begins. Rey and Evan are beat down and left on the mat. As Miz and Morrison are about to leave however, a locker room appears on screen. As we watch, Shad and JTG walk in and begin rifling through bags and things, getting excited at what they find.]
Shad – Yo’ man, check this out, we got some fur coats up in here!
JTG – Hey, I got some pimp hats and shades!
[Miz and Morrison are clearly annoyed]
Morrison – Hey, that’s our locker room! You leave that stuff there you have no idea how much it costs!
[JTG leaves for a moment and comes back with a shopping cart. They load up everything in the room and leave]
Miz – Hey, where are you going with that stuff!! Get back here!
[Miz and Morrison stare at each other in frustration]
{Brooklyn, Brooklyn!}
[Miz and Morrison look around in confusion when no one comes out. The camera closes in and we see Cryme Tyme enter near the top of some stairs in the crowd pushing the cart full of Miz and Morrison’s stuff]
Shad – Alright, we got an exclusive sale goin’ on right now!
JTG – That’s right, we got fur coats, pimp hats, gold chains, whatever you want!
Miz – That is our stuff, don’t any of you dare buy that!!
Shad – C’mon, I got real fur coats, do I hear $10?
Morrison – That is a $5000 fur coat!! Don’t touch that!!
[Shad and JTG continue until they sell everything in the cart]
Morrison – Who the hell do you two think you are? We are the tag team champions!
Shad – Man, it’s not about the gold…it’s about that Money Money!
JTG – Yeah Yeah!
Shad – That Money Money!
JTG –Yeah Yeah!
[The crowd joins in and continues the chant as Miz and Morrison get angrier in the ring. Suddenly, Rey and Evan attack them as they turn around. Evan uses a Hurricarana to take Miz out of the ring and Rey trips Morrison onto the second rope before hitting a 619. Miz pulls him from the ring after the move and they make their way up the ramp, angry frustrated at both the other teams]
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Commercial Break
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Grisham – Ladies and Gentleman, It’s time for our main event!
Striker – That’s right and it’s going to be a good one!
{Weelllll…It’s a Big Shoooww}
{Break the Walls Down!}
[Jericho poses and then walks down the ramp to join Big Show in the ring.]
{I Walk Alone}
[Batista comes out and poses as the pyro goes off. He then walks to the bottom of the ramp and waits for his partner]
{Ohhhhhhh, Yeaaaahhhhh}
[Matt Hardy holds up his title and poses on the stage before walking to the ring. He and Batista get in as Show and Jericho stare them down]
////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Match #3: Matt Hardy & Batista vs. Big Show & Chris Jericho:
Jericho and Hardy start the match. They exchange blows and are pretty evenly matched. Hardy goes off the ropes and hits a swinging neck breaker to score a near fall. Jericho trips Hardy and applies a leglock. They exchange holds and reverse each other several times. Finally, Jericho crawls over and tags in Show. He steps in and throws a huge right hand knocking Hardy to the canvas. He then steps on Hardy’s chest knocking the wind out of him. He taunts Batista as he lifts Hardy above his head and then drops him to the mat. Jericho gets tagged back in and applies the Walls of Jericho. After a few moments of pain, Matt manages to reach the ropes. The hold is broken and Jericho backs off for a moment, getting in Batista’s face. When he comes back, Hardy begins throwing rights and lefts. He then goes for a Twist of Fate but Jericho reverses and tries the Codebreaker. Hardy pushes him off and dropkicks him back toward his corner. With both men worn out on the mat, Jericho manages to tag Show again, who grabs Hardy just before he can tag Batista. He throws some more clubbing blows at Hardy before whipping him off the ropes. When Hardy hits the far ropes, Batista’s tags himself in but Show doesn’t see it. He lifts Hardy and tosses him from the ring. When he turns around though, Batista spears him straight to hell. Jericho runs in to try and help but gets a Spinebuster for his efforts. Batista tries to set Show up for the Batista Bomb but can’t pull it off as Show stands up flipping Batista to the mat. He tags in Jericho who hits a lionsault and scores a near fall. Batista climbs to his feet and throws some rights at Jericho. He then whips him into a corner and crushes him. He whips him into his corner and tags in Hardy. Batista lifts Jericho to his shoulders as Hardy goes to the top. He then hits Jericho with a huge side effect off of Batista’s shoulders. He scores a near fall as Big Show breaks up the count. Batista comes back in and attacks Big Show knocking both men over the top. Jericho goes for the Codebreaker again but Hardy plants him on the mat. Jericho gets up holding his back, and is kicked in the gut as he turns around. Batista prevents Show from getting back in as Hardy connects with a Twist of Fate and picks up the win.
Winners: Matt Hardy & Batista
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Grisham – And the champ wins, but who will the #1 Contender be?
Striker – I think we’re about to find out Todd
[Vickie comes down to the ring and steps inside]
Vickie – Ladies and Gentlemen, after that last match….Excuse Me! After that last match, I have decided who the #1 Contender will be.
[The fans begin chanting for Batista, drowning Vickie out for a moment.]
Vickie – Excuse Me! I have decided who the new #1 Contender will be. At Backlash, it will be Matt Hardy vs. The Big Show for the Extreme Heavyweight Title.
[The fans boo even louder as Show smiles.]
Vickie – You can boo as you want but it won’t make a difference, because I am the General Manager and what I way goes, no matter what!!
{Here Comes The Money!!}
[Shane McMahon walks out to the ramp and the fans cheer. He already has a microphone in his hand as he walks down the ramp]
Shane – Vickie, I hate to interrupt but I have something important I came here to say. However, seeing as I’ve walked into this situation, I’ll deal with this first. I don’t know about you, but I was impressed with all these superstars here tonight. So therefore, I think that next week, we should have a Triple-Threat match featuring the Big Show, Chris Jericho, and Batista with the winner to be named #1 Contender for Matt Hardy’s title.
Vickie – Excuse Me, but I have already decided who the #1 contender is. I am the General Manager here and this is my show!
[Shane is visibly annoyed at this disrespect.]
Shane – Well, last time I checked, my name was McMahon which means that what I say goes and if you don’t like it I can have them find a spot for you in the unemployment line.
[The fans cheer at this idea. Vickie reluctantly backs down and leaves and the superstars follow her.]
Shane – Now then, to get to the real reason I’m here tonight. My father, Vince McMahon, is in an intensive care unit right now. He’s stable but it took a while to get him that way. Do you know why he’s there?! Because last night, someone assaulted him in a parking lot and then ran off like the coward he is. I am here to announce that my sister Stephanie and I are launching a full investigation into who did this. We will be interrogating superstars on all four brands because there’s no guarantee that it was someone on Raw. And if that coward is watching right now, let me make one thing perfectly clear. You’d better hope to God that we don’t find you, because if we do, you will pay for what you did, and let me warn you that hell hath no fury like The McMahon’s!!!!!!